I just want to dance.
Something Inside July 27, 2008
Dave pushed the door open with the flat of his back. It swang right open and he found himself heaved against door-frame, panting.
Suddenly whatever was going on in the bedroom opposite the kitchen stopped, and two half dressed teens rolled out into an excuse of a hallway.
“Shit, Dave!”
The red on Dave’s stained jumper was running down off the door onto the carpet. He rolled his face from off his shoulder towards the guy with his girlfriend.
He was moving. One heavy shoe after the other, he stumbled towards the laundry.
“Dave, I’m sorry – I didn’t mean to-” Ross was choking now, he could barely make out Dave’s profile with the front curtains drawn.
Bleeding through the hand on his ribs, David put a sprawled palm before the two faces to his left:
“Could not – give less – of a – fahhk.” The corners of his mouth twitched for a split second at an accidental pun – but now the laundry was all he wanted.
The laundry door now closed, the sordid pair heard a dull thud against the tiles, and all the bottles in the cabinet behind the mirror spill all over its damp hillside. They’d been in there, too.
The water ran, and almost every painful movement involved in undoing the zip on Dave’s jumper could be heard. When the carpet outside the laundry started becoming wet the door was opened.
And there was David, dead on the laundry floor.
Gosh! July 23, 2008
That fucking video! It’s like The Ring or something!
.
Okay, lets count – I have seven days .. Even though it was ages ago…
Letters and cuttings July 18, 2008
Most of them came down last night, at about midnight. I did it because I needed more blue-tack. I might put them back up again, I think I’ve gotten used to them being there. I’m not sure if it means much anymore, I remember sitting on the end of my bed at looking at it all, feeling kind of complete and hopeful.
.
All I do now is sit around and think about it all, I think its making me ill. I think Mum made me do it, but I was unhappy with how I was treated, and then things were said I didn’t really like, so for everyone’s protection I did it. I’m glad I did, I feel happier now I have my own life, although I wish it hadn’t've happened.
.
I wrote a counter-curse. I think it’s working.
I take the weather with me. July 16, 2008
Trumpet Solo.
.
Salty sea dog
Alloy at his lips
All deshevelled
Sad calls to all my ships
.
Captain, My Captain.
.
My oh my,
“The sun did shine on the fields of youth”
You three
Will always be light years ahead of me
You give me the kind
of protection my lack of maturity
causes me to find.
.
No such thing as -
.
Brown eyes
Impossible transient spaces
I’m lost,
so far lost and dreaming
so far unsavable
How far in between have we travelled?
Have we gone anywhere at all?
Moving glances
Watchtowers, chains and dogs
.
If I didn’t need crutches
Maybe something might have happened
.
That’s a convenient lie
.
Hull Breach
.
If I plumbed the depths
I would find the silent fireworks
Iridescent everythings
Fleeting eyes
And panels
.
Up, down, inside
behind a wheel
fear and exhaustion
floats the boat of war
.
Reddened eyes, loosened collars
“Section C reports damage to
life-support…”
puzzles, puns, riddles
“Sir we’ve lost deck 11!”
.
Amongst the gases and tiny lights
The metal churns
Bolting towards no known point
Christmas lights of pretty death.
Trails of plum, ribbons of ridiculous speed
.
Peppered sheets scream for mercy
wounds raining useless glitter
Dolls suspended from the grim other-world
