It's betrayal
You've told the truth
and you're conflicted
Its somehow self indulgant – It makes you sick
Now nothing you say will make it right
You've closed that door
You wanted distance
“You're on your fucking plane, away from those you knew sir.”
Because you're selfish
Because you want to start again, and you won't fix it
You're immature.
If I were you, you'd be disgusted with me too.